Textbooks are expensive. Most of us are buying — or should have been buying — textbooks around this time in the semester. But here we are, post-Labor Day weekend, and you’re probably still searching for a free PDF version online.

When people say textbooks cost an arm and a leg, I disagree. Sure, I’ll sell a toe or a kidney here or there, but those aren’t as essential. Selling an arm and a leg would be counterproductive because there are so many things I’ve needed that arm and leg for, how could I lose them over the ever-rising costs of textbooks?

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Now, you might suggest I get a job to afford textbooks. That’s great, because my full-time job was being a resident adviser — which doesn’t pay you anything other than a free room and meal plan.

So, I’ve had to resort to other measures.

For example, if I sold an arm and a leg, I wouldn’t be able to sell pictures of my feet on the internet. Now, you might be wondering, how great are my feet that people are willing to pay for pictures of them? They’re not — they’re actually pretty gross. But some people are into that and I have to take advantage so I can read the 2018 version of “Eighth Edition of the Essentials of Oceanography.”

Another way to afford textbooks is to submit yourself to experiments. You may be put in the Stanford Prison Experiment, but at least you’re making New York minimum wage. What’s a little mental trauma in exchange of a hard copy of “Moby Dick,” even though there should be a free PDF online at this point?

Unfortunately, I’m not lucky enough to be able to get a sugar momma. I wish I was, but apparently old rich women in Syracuse aren’t looking for guys like me to eat at diners with.

But when I finally get enough money together to think I can afford my textbooks, I usually realize I’m not even close. Why’s that? The two words college students hate most: access code. I’m glad I have to not only pay extra for the book, but also for a six-digit number so that I can take online quizzes that the professor doesn’t even make.

What’s nice is I can at least sell back the books I opened twice during the semester at the end of the year. So, I’ll take the $400+ worth of books I bought back to the bookstore, trade them in for $5.47 and throw that in the sewer.

As a senior, I have no textbooks. Heck, I’ll even drop a class if textbooks are required to do homework or are somehow roped into the curriculum. Am I losing out academically? Sure. But if we’re required to buy six books at more than $50 each without regard for price, maybe, just maybe, that professor doesn’t care about you and you’re already losing out academically, anyway.

Josh Feinblatt is a senior television, radio, film major currently studying in Los Angeles (because he’s better than you). He stopped buying textbooks a long time ago, and found that stealing them was a much better option. He can be reached on twitter @joshfeinblatt or by email at jfeinbla@syr.edu with all textbook PDFs or free access codes you want to send him.

Published on September 5, 2018 at 11:20 pm